Neatly Folded

It seems the universe has not found too many patient ears for some time. Relentless dreams and visions have started playing tricks on my sense of reality. My body demands longer hours of isolation, to sleep.. to wander in the world of the mind and soak in everything. I would not have been perturbed if the visions did not start, so blatantly, borrowing images from my mortal existence. I am trying to chronicle the flow of dreams so far and I hope it will help me make sense of them all. I am not sure of the time when I saw this dream, it could have been late on Saturday morning. It was part graphics or maybe just a burst of activity that I could not see through but what I saw very clearly was a floating lotus-shaped figure. I could recognise it instantly and yet I hesitated, even when it was closed I could feel that not was not a good sign. And then, it opened as if it's trance had been broken by my presence and that's when I recognised it fully. A third eye. An angry third eye! I...

It has been quite a few months since my last room partner, Emma, bid me goodbye. A silent entity, I will remember her for her uncanny habit of finding her way into my bed soon after she knew that I had drifted into sleep and lie next to me causing my quilt to slide away towards her. It really pissed me off at times! Having to wake up again and again from my sound sleep to pull the quilt back on me, only to recede to my slumber and be woken yet again. I don't think it was just my imagination that I could hear Emma stifle a laugh. I just snort back in irritation and draw myself back into sleep. I often wondered about how Emma came to live with me. A peaceful childlike entity like her sharing space with a moody loudmouth like me. She must have had her own share of complains about me too. I never truly understood anything about her except that for some strange reason she felt protected around me. Perhaps because I didn't treat her like the other people she might have chanced upon. ...

There was nothing that could calm her down. Everything about her life was falling to pieces and she juggled multiple facets of her life, trying to restore some peace and order. But they just kept falling apart. She tried everything to keep herself calm, called up her friends, meditated and tried to read in whatever time she got to keep her mind from steering off course. "I don't know what's going on?" she said aloud to herself, flinging down her book. "Someone somewhere is really upset with me," she continued to the invisible audience, breaking down into tears. "My boss doesn't like me. My work is getting too hectic. My friends keep fighting and are very unhappy. I have no money left. I have nothing to look forward to," she complained. "There's tomorrow," said a familiar voice. The thought confused her but she found it strangely comforting. "Look outside," said the voice, "it is cold and dark and there seems no chan...

Yes, I got hit by another emotional asteroid and decided to channelise the emotion into discovering something intelligible to the brain. Seems like Musicology provides just the answer I was getting at. There are, in fact, songs that can trigger depression and songs like this 'Hungarian Suicide Song' have been banned from the airwaves for their effect on the general psyche. You can find it as the 'Gloomy Sunday' song on Youtube, it has been covered by several artisted and I liked Portishead's version a lot. While on youtube also see "Ten Ways - Gloomy Sunday" for the interpretation of the song by a musicologist. Perhaps it is the dialect that does not let me connect with any of the 'international suicide chartbusters'. I didn't feel 'sucked in' by Radiohead's 'Creep' or Rihanna's 'Love the way you Lie' as much as I felt distraught by 'Koi Fariyaad' and 'Tum Bin'. I am sure I will find just the note...