Neatly Folded

It seems the universe has not found too many patient ears for some time. Relentless dreams and visions have started playing tricks on my sense of reality. My body demands longer hours of isolation, to sleep.. to wander in the world of the mind and soak in everything. I would not have been perturbed if the visions did not start, so blatantly, borrowing images from my mortal existence. I am trying to chronicle the flow of dreams so far and I hope it will help me make sense of them all. I am not sure of the time when I saw this dream, it could have been late on Saturday morning. It was part graphics or maybe just a burst of activity that I could not see through but what I saw very clearly was a floating lotus-shaped figure. I could recognise it instantly and yet I hesitated, even when it was closed I could feel that not was not a good sign. And then, it opened as if it's trance had been broken by my presence and that's when I recognised it fully. A third eye. An angry third eye! I...

It has been quite a few months since my last room partner, Emma, bid me goodbye. A silent entity, I will remember her for her uncanny habit of finding her way into my bed soon after she knew that I had drifted into sleep and lie next to me causing my quilt to slide away towards her. It really pissed me off at times! Having to wake up again and again from my sound sleep to pull the quilt back on me, only to recede to my slumber and be woken yet again. I don't think it was just my imagination that I could hear Emma stifle a laugh. I just snort back in irritation and draw myself back into sleep. I often wondered about how Emma came to live with me. A peaceful childlike entity like her sharing space with a moody loudmouth like me. She must have had her own share of complains about me too. I never truly understood anything about her except that for some strange reason she felt protected around me. Perhaps because I didn't treat her like the other people she might have chanced upon. ...

There was nothing that could calm her down. Everything about her life was falling to pieces and she juggled multiple facets of her life, trying to restore some peace and order. But they just kept falling apart. She tried everything to keep herself calm, called up her friends, meditated and tried to read in whatever time she got to keep her mind from steering off course. "I don't know what's going on?" she said aloud to herself, flinging down her book. "Someone somewhere is really upset with me," she continued to the invisible audience, breaking down into tears. "My boss doesn't like me. My work is getting too hectic. My friends keep fighting and are very unhappy. I have no money left. I have nothing to look forward to," she complained. "There's tomorrow," said a familiar voice. The thought confused her but she found it strangely comforting. "Look outside," said the voice, "it is cold and dark and there seems no chan...

Yes, I got hit by another emotional asteroid and decided to channelise the emotion into discovering something intelligible to the brain. Seems like Musicology provides just the answer I was getting at. There are, in fact, songs that can trigger depression and songs like this 'Hungarian Suicide Song' have been banned from the airwaves for their effect on the general psyche. You can find it as the 'Gloomy Sunday' song on Youtube, it has been covered by several artisted and I liked Portishead's version a lot. While on youtube also see "Ten Ways - Gloomy Sunday" for the interpretation of the song by a musicologist. Perhaps it is the dialect that does not let me connect with any of the 'international suicide chartbusters'. I didn't feel 'sucked in' by Radiohead's 'Creep' or Rihanna's 'Love the way you Lie' as much as I felt distraught by 'Koi Fariyaad' and 'Tum Bin'. I am sure I will find just the note...

This is yet another of those bigger truths that simply floated into my mind during a late night conversation with my soul. I was thinking about some random occult practices that I haven't practiced in a while (not that I am a devout follower) when I it occurred to me that the concept of time, is a man-made one. God, doesn't understand or adhere to man's principle of time. Think about it, the day doesn't start or end at the same time. Time is not the constant, sunrise and sunset are. The seasons are not dependant on time, life and death are not dependant on time either. We, as humans, have devised time as a tool. This led me to the other question, why? Why do we need time? Well, how else would man have justified his other great concoction, reality. Time is a measure for reality. If a person dies, we are in a state of shock. We call it an untimely death or worse, "Their time was up." Really? As someone who strongly believes that every human being on the face of ...

I believe that once you have immersed yourself in the cosmic energy and have managed to develop, even for a short while, a connect with the higher source then it continues to speak to you through your subconscious. For instance, I have never been able to understand how it is that the realisation of all bigger truths have occurred to me between 1.30 am and 2.30 am when I am sitting on my bed with my blanket or quilt wrapped around me and always, through a conversation with myself. Before you start laughing, I have been talking aloud to myself since childhood and find it greatly therapeutic. Even before I read about the ill-effects of oversleeping in a copy of the Manusmriti, I had known that some of my most bizzare dreams have been well after waking hours. Normally when I fall into the habit of sleeping only after daybreak these dreams/nightmares find their way into my sleep-ridden mind and wake me up with a start in the early hours of the afternoon. Today's nightmare was no differe...

Today's revelation came in the form of a Google search. Driven by some visions that have been plaguing my mind and the impact of a horror movie that I recently saw and have not been able to steer clear of, I searched for a solution. Page after morbid page, finally led me to a site on Past Life Regression. Not a new concept to me, I have somehow always turned my back on the possibility of the core issue being beyond my current birth. There has been ample turbulence in this lifetime to keep me overworked. Another reason that stopped me from considering Past Life Regression is the complete absence of any pattern to guide me towards the same. Generally, there is a fixed formula like repeated nightmares, visions of people who one has never met and yet feeling strongly connected to, inexplicable fears including fear of death or of any elements that leave a trail to the past life incidents. A visit to previous life experiences can help bring more meaning to life and heal the wounds that t...